Belzebuub

The Death of the Egos, the Path, Voluntary Suffering

Belzebuub: We have to be realistic when it comes to the inner death: if anyone thinks that with a frame of mind or a certain little practice they can just be transformed like that, it’s another form of self deceit.

The good news is that the psyche can change. If we really do this work, then we transform our psychology, we transform the very make-up, and then, life is different. Sounds, everything, is transformed.

However, there’s still the struggle of daily life, and if we’re starting off, or even walking along the path, we’ve got very, very many difficulties to overcome, and it’s overcoming those difficulties that’s really part of the work. It’s what it’s about; we’ve got tests, initiations, and things like that. They can be absolutely horrible to go through! Horrible! And you can’t say that it’s all going to be a blissful thing, because there’s light and darkness, and we have to face the darkness. And to face the darkness, we can go through pain and suffering.

But as you're going through this struggle, you may notice that, for example, as you get up, this usual ego of negativity starts coming in. Then you die to that. You observe the very first trigger, as it happens; then you start to learn the intricate ways of this particular ego. And with that knowledge, once you uncover it, the ego has less power over you. It hasless power over us if we can see how it starts, how it’s triggered off, how it works within us. But to see it and to uncover it, we have to go through it. There’s no magic pill that will give us a state of peace and bliss. And if we simply want to run away and live like a sort of a garden ornament, a garden Buddha ornament, [laughs] it's a waste of life. We’re just running away from the learning that we can be going through.

So, we’re going to face lots of difficulties in life. And if we go through the Path, then we face ones that are part of this plan, this sequence of events. If we start the Path, then we voluntarily join in this sequence of events, which can be horrible, really horrible to go through! But at the end of each one,  if we pass it, there’s a reward, an inner reward. Not the badge or the “great guy” sort of thing, but an inner reward. And in fact, along the way, more and more people start to hate us, for no reason. So you shouldn't look forward to being boosted as a person, because you’re just going to be going through a lot of things, and people will look at you very negatively, and you haven’t done anything wrong. And yet, it’s like this in all sorts of things that we do throughout the day; whether things go wrong or not, we can feel negative or we could feel angry or whatever. It can be our fault in certain circumstances, and yet we can react towards somebody.

All this, if we observe, we’ll begin to see. And as we begin to see it, then we uncover it, it looses its power, we do the death on it, gradually get free of it. Life is a struggle, but in this case a struggle with rewards, inner rewards. They're rewards that you can’t see physically, but nevertheless they take place - in the astral pane, in the higher dimensions, and within your psychology.

But it really requires a struggle. If there’s no struggle, there’s no reward, there’s nothing to overcome.

We see things like swords in the internal worlds. A sword is for killing things. And you see this picture of Michael, slaying this Lucifer, this creature, this thing. It’s not, “Bless you, my son.” It’s a sword! Death! Decapitation and all these sort of things! It’s not to bless the ego and we’ll all live together, peacefully, happily ever after. This is a real war, a real struggle.

But it is in this struggle- that we learn, and we put ourselves through difficulties voluntarily so that we learn and we hopefully pass tests. But we go through them voluntarily, and to the outside world that would be madness, wouldn’t it? Voluntarily suffering!

You have to have a certain understanding to be able to suffer voluntarily. And you suffer because you know that by putting yourself through something, you’re going to get something out of it.

Q: With the death sometimes there’s a pressure in my head. Where does that come from besides just egos or by forcing it?

Belzebuub: That generally comes by forcing awareness. So if you’re trying to do the death and trying to force your mind to be aware, you can get a headache. The way to do it is that you apply the death and at the same time you observe so that you are clearing inside, and then the outside - really being the result of the inside - is clear, naturally. So, if for example we now try to be aware by looking at something, and just trying to force this awareness (no observation, just trying to force the awareness) we can sort of manage things, but it is like we’re hidden to what’s happening inside. And then after a while of doing this, you can actually get a headache. And if you try to do the death and force like this, you can also get a headache. So, you look inside, and you see any inner state that’s going on, and you apply the death to it. Any thing, any feeling of any kind, any sensation - you apply the death to it. And then, you just keep doing that so that everything gets clear. Whenever you see anything that spoils that clarity, apply the death to it straight away, knowing that we’re trying really to be here.

This is a result of practice, so practice, so that you learn how this works. We’ll review it later on.

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